An Inventory
by darkchocol8807
Summary: In which Scorpius Malfoy takes an inventory of the Potter-Weasley-Lupin-Longbottom-Scamander-Malfoy clan... Semi-Prequel to Red Rose LLP/SM


An Inventory

For those who need 'score' cards like Scorpius Malfoy did when he first met the Potter-Weasley clan (now better known as the Potter-Weasley-Lupin-Longbottom-Scamander-Malfoy clan), here is how it goes:

(Not surprisingly, all the Potter-Weasley-Lupin spawns are in Gryffindor, so that helps the memory. Also, unless noted otherwise, they're all redheads. They may have different shades of red, but they all have red hair nonetheless. )

Lily Potter, Hugo Weasley and Alexis Longbottom are all fourth years. Alexis, best known as the Happy Hufflepuff, is metaphorically attached to hip with Lily Potter. Hugo Weasley, the lazy genius that he is, prefers the company of these girls than everyone else who bothers him about working to his potential.

Roxanne Weasley and Lucy Weasley are both Chasers on the Quidditch team. And though Lucy does have 'Uncle Percy tendencies', she has helped Roxanne (a true daughter of George Weasley) outsmart and out-prank the 'Trickster Triad' on several occasions. It's also useful that the Scamander twins are in Ravenclaw and they have used their intelligent eccentricities to aid these fifth year Weasley girls in their retaliation pranks. Because of that, Uncle George and Uncle Percy were quite generous in giving their blessings when Roxanne and Lucy started dating Lorcan and Lysander, respectively.

Head girl, Molly Weasley is as ambitious and hard-working as her father. She is now planning to train as a Healer at St. Mungos. Unlike her father, she is practically a clone of Grandma Weasley, making her an expert in information gathering (gossip) and interrogation (scaring the crap out of all her cousins to tell her everything). James, Fred and Louis, a.k.a. the Trickster Triad, are also graduating from Hogwarts this year. No, neither one of them became Head Boy. With detention records as long as the Thames, it has come as quite a shock to everyone when they decided to study separate classes and concentrations to prepare for their careers. Fred is planning to go the United States to open the first Weasley Wizarding Wheezes branch in New York. Louis, the first blond male Weasley in centuries, also hopes to follow his dad's footsteps and go off to Egypt to train as a curse breaker. James on the other hand, is already recruited to play for England's National Team this upcoming World Cup as a Beater, making him the youngest starting Beater in Quidditch World Cup history.

Now there's also Dominique Weasley, the legendary Hogwarts' Heartbreaker. She graduated three years ago, but not before Rueben Hagrid swept her off her feet, shocking family, admirers, and spectators alike. The gentle part-giant was left on Hagrid's doorstep about twenty years ago with a note that states that he is Hagrid's child. Everyone suspects that he's Madame Olympus' son and at that, Aunt Fleur welcomed the relationship with open arms. Now, Dom is almost done training to become the family's first Auror in this generation. Despite Aurors' zombie hours and Rueben's work in the Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, Dominique has now reformed and has become a disgusting romantic (at least in Scorpius' opinion).

The oldest Weasley is best known throughout the Quidditch world as the 'Blonde Bludger'. The petite pixie-like princess has continually stigmatized admirers with her brute strength as the youngest Beater Gryffindor has ever had. Like her Uncle Harry, she was recruited on her first year after she punched the gigantic Brutus Nott across the Transfiguration room in the middle of class. Of course, Professor McGonagall sent for 'Wood.' However, not even the handsome Ethan Wood could charm Victoire that long when Teddy Lupin was constantly hexing him throughout the season.

It took Scorpius' clumsy metamorphmagus cousin seven years to finally ask his best friend and the girl of his dreams out, with the joint forces of the female Weasleys. (This obviously did not include the help of James, Fred and Louis, or else that would have just ended in disaster!) But fortunately, Teddy managed to woo the blonde Weasley just before he started Auror training.

Now lastly, on their sixth year is himself (Scorpius), Albus Potter, Rose Weasley and Francesca Longbottom. Despite being a Slytherin like his forefathers before him, Scorpius has spent more time with the Gryffindors than people in his own house. Scorpius credits their friendship to broken stairwell that led the four of them to a magical portal to the Forbidden Forest on their first year. Being chased by hungry giant spiders can apparently bond children like nothing else. Despite their vast differences (much to Lucius Malfoy's horror), they have been quite inseparable.

Albus, his best mate, would most likely be the first Potter male in three generations to not fall for a redhead, as in just recent years, he's discovered unsuspecting feelings for the bubbly, blonde Longbottom. Frankie is probably the least academic of them all, falling asleep in Care for Magical Creatures and blowing up solutions in Potions. However because of her extensive knowledge of Herbology, the only class she puts effort in (what choice did she have really? Her father's teaching it!), she's already invited to join the Herbology Program in St. Mungos as an intern this past summer.

Since their first year, Scorpius and Rose have had a tug-of-war game regarding the rank of first in their class. Unlike her lazy brother, Rose is focused, hard-working and competitive. Really, Scorpius actually does his work just to irk her. Strangely, they're both abysmal at Potions and have been surprisingly been beaten by none other than Albus Severus Potter himself! (Harry Potter was speechless for an entire day!)Despite the well-known fact that Rose inherited her mother's brains, what most people don't know is that she also inherited her father's sense of obliviousness. In her six year in Hogwarts, she never noticed the stares and drools that comes her way and she has unintentionally rebuffed every admirer that tried to ask her out. It doesn't help, of course that Scorpius, with the help of Al and the Triad have hexed every guy that audacity to ask her out. No, Scorpius doesn't like her that way, rather he affectionately finds Rosie the twin sister he never wanted.

Now for those wondering about the point of this Potter-Weasley-Lupin-Longbottom-Scamander-Malfoy inventory, Scorpius was actually just taking note of what, or rather who, he would be dealing with if he ever makes his move on Little Lily Potter. Between the overprotective pranksters, Beaters, Aurors, and Poison, err… Potion freaks in the family, he doubted he stood a chance. And that's just Lily's brothers and cousins, let's not forget the adults!

Scorpius sighed. Even though he's been practically family since forever, he doubted they would accept a marriage between a Potter and a Malfoy.

…

Did he say marriage!

…

'Merlin! Yes, he did!' Scorpius banged his head on the library table. He must be the craziest 16-year-old to ever walk the Great Halls of Hogwarts. But honestly, he couldn't think of anyone else he want to be with for the rest of his life.

The tiny sprite was fun, care-free, and kind. She's a Seeker whiz, though for the past years, most Slytherins have shrugged it off as Scorpius is never focused when she's around (therefore he's always benched during Gryffindor-Slytherin matches). Outraged, he used to rage and protest against the injustice. It wasn't until recently that he realized that it's true and stopped fighting his teammates and his feelings.

Lily was smart, funny and downright cute and adorable, sometimes Scorpius wishes he could hug her and cuddle her for hours. She was quite something. She looked past his last name and proclaimed him her third best friend back when he visited Godric's Hollow for Christmas during his first year. (He's third only after Alexis and Hugo, but he figures it's only because she's known them longer. Give it time, he'd be replacing Longbottom from that number one spot soon enough). Scorpius dropped his head on the table again. Now he's being a child, and he knows it.

He was doomed. He blames his cowardice on his Slytherin blood. If he wasn't so terrified of the Weasley women (he was only somewhat afraid of the males and from experience, he could manage at least half of them), he would've manned up and asked Lily to go to Hogsmeade with him today. Instead, she left this morning with Brent McLaggen. If that git even tries to snog her, Scorpius clenched his fists and slammed his head back down the table.

"Merlin, Score! Are you trying to get yourself a concussion?" Albus appeared, joining him in the table. "Whose wand's up your ass?"

"Nothing." Scorpius muttered. Who was he kidding? He could never tell his best friend that he's in love with his little sister. No, Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy will just die alone for the rest of his life. Even worse, his grandfather would arrange him to be married to one of those cranky Slytherin pure-bloods and he'll just be miserable for the rest of eternity.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine!" Scorpius snapped. "Sorry, I just got a lot in my mind. Where are Frankie and Rose anyway?" He asked quickly changing the subject.

Albus rolled his eyes. "Somewhere with the rest of the female cousins. ..Urgent girl talk..." They both shuddered. The last girl talk landed the triad in the middle of the freezing lake right before Christmas break last year."I hope this is something about that idiot McLaggen." Though Scorpius should feel somewhat hopeful, he wasn't that heartless. Yes, they both just pity the poor fool who's right now subjected in the infamous 'Girl Talk'.

….

-Meanwhile during Girl Talk-

"Ladies, we need to do something about Scorpius Malfoy!" Frankie Longbottom exclaimed. "He's become quite unbearable!"

"It can't really be helped that he's so thick!" Lucy added, "Seriously, can't he see that Lily's just about given up on him?"

"Really! From what I'm seeing is that all he needs is a push in the right direction." Molly put in.

"Agreed!" Piped Roxanne as everyone else nodded in agreement.

"So Rosie," Alexis turned to the resident genius, "any plans?"

"As a matter of fact," grinned the Weasley prodigy like a Cheshire cat with cream, "I do! Here's what we'll do…"

…

Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy never stood a chance.


End file.
